


The monsters are always IN the closet

by orphan_account



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Big Brother Gabriel, Carry On My Wayward Son, Coming Out, Gabriel Lives, Gay, Happy Ending, I Ship It, LGBTQ Character, Little Brother Castiel, M/M, Multi, Sam Ships It, Short Stories, Working Out My Feelings Through Fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-31
Updated: 2014-08-12
Packaged: 2018-02-11 06:29:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,727
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2057442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just take a few characters and assume minimum one of them is gay/bi in every chapter.  Now let them come out of the closet, because staying there isn't good, it is a dark and scary place with monsters haunting you. Being outside feels much better...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sam

**Author's Note:**

> My little "project" for showing how important coming out is. (whatever place you take in the lgbtq community)  
> Maybe I take more characters, maybe I even do a series, depends on my mood.  
> As always no rights on the characters, unfortunately not earning just one penny with it and please tell major mistakes and if you liked it or not. But please just constructive criticism I want to improve.

Sam always knew he was different. And he always knew it wasn't all because of the demon blood flowing in his body.  
School was a hard time for him, not the learning, it seemed to be the only thing he was good at. The friends were the problem. Dean was the older and cooler one, the one with the hot girls on his side and though he always tried to ignore the others, many people seemed to find him cool. Sam never was this way and often he didn't even want to. There were moments he wished he would socialize more easily, for example when his classmates celebrated birthdays or had a houseparty. The first time he was invited to a party, he couldn't go. John took him on an easy hunt again, to improve his shooting skills.  
By the time the boys in his class ahd their first girlfriend, he killed monsters with his family.  
By this time he started to notice he wasn't even interested in girls. He didn't know who to tell that though. He knew a man who screamed at him when he missed the target he should practise, called them his „wayward sons“ on or simply slapping them for failing a hunt wouldn't accept him, so he stayed silent.  
He stayed silent infront of his brother for many years aswell. Dean had been always there for him, but he was so obsessed with his dad and the family business, Sam often feared he would betry him.  
When he was old enough he left in the hope it would get better.  
But Sam didn't have the courage to come out in this time.  
Silence hurt. Being together with Jess so no one thought he could be gay hurt. Falling for a fellow student and having no one he could tell it hurt.  
And then Dean came back and took him on the hunt and he always asked himself: „Why do I do this to me? Why do I hurt myself, instead of telling someone?“ But the fear grew too big everytime. And even after John's death he was anxious and he didn't know why. He had nothing to fear.  
When Sam died, he died in silence. Sam didn't want to end up like this.  
When Sam woke up again, he didn't want to go on like this.  
In the second night he sighed as he wa sitting next to Dean.  
„What's wrong, Sammy?“ he asked his little brother who took a deep breath. „Dean, you know I always was different from the others and how I never had many relationships with women“ He made a little pause to check if Dean was listening. When Dean just briefly nodded Sam went on: „And I always feared dad would say something and I don't know why, but I feared you would too, but I know how stupid all this is, but please don't say anything stupid, okay?“ Dean nodded again. „Dean, I am-“ he wanted to finish this sentence short and uncomplicated, but stopped when he saw Dean's cunning smile. „Gay?“ Sam's eyes wided. „Yes, but how- How do you know?“ Dean jumped up and walked a few steps toward Sam, looking him directly in his eyes.. „I am your big brother, I know such things. I know it since you were in middle-school, but I waited til you said it yourself, god dammit, it was about time now!“ Sam smiled relieved. „And dad?“ Dean shaked his head. „No, dad was too busy teaching us shooting and killing and Latin and stuff.“  
„But was it so obvios?“ Dean laughed. „Somehow, yes. And now we finally get you a boyfriend or I turn crazy“  
From this day Sam didn't live in silence anymore and he didn't feel so different now.


	2. Dean

Dean tried to remember when the last time was he really smiled. Mostly smiling is a masquerade for him, hiding his sadness.  
And Dean was sad. His live had never been easy, that was clear. His mother died, his father died and time after time everyone he liked. And already three times he thought he wouldn't see his brother ever again.  
The first time was when Sam left home. Dean could somehow understand it, but he wanted nothing more than his little Sammy back. The little Sammy he raised up when John wasn't there, the boy he had to comfort when John was mean again. He even learned cooking, although he hated it, but new he had to care for his little brother.  
When Sam left he was alone with his dad, who never really understood why Sam left. He focused only on the hunting, hiding that he missed him so much.  
He got out for pleasure, sleeping with every woman he could find, eating every thing he could find, killing everything he could find,  
This didn't change when John vanished and he searched him with Sam, but he felt less alone then. Less empty.  
Less, but there still was a big pit in his soul he didn't know how to fix.  
Many years he didn't know, many years he didn't even had the idea it could be a person, but then he met an angel.  
It seemed like an cliché for him, falling for a mysterious stranger he wasn't even allowed to fall for, but Dean couldn't help himself. You can never stop yourself falling in love, whoever it is.  
He was a bit confused first, he always thought he'd be totally straight, but with every moment with Cas, he noticed how he wasn't.  
But how should he explain that? There wasn't even a chance of a relationship, even when he loved him back.  
And Dean was sad about that.  
He wasn't sure what he was most sad about, but not even telling his brother felt wrong.  
In this one night when they were sitting in Bobby's house Dean took all of his courage. "Sammy?" Sammy looked toward him, the eyes a bit out of focus. "Can't we do this tomorrow? I just reacherd a whole book," he mumbled, almost falling asleep. "No!" Sam shrugged. "please let it be important." Dean nervously played with his hand.  
"I think I am in love" Dean felt how he blushed, did he really say that? Sam chuckled. "With the waitress yesterday or what?" Dean shaked his head. "No. I REALLY fell in love and the problem is that this love is a bit problematic.." Sam frowned. "How old is she?" Dean avoided eyecontact, he felt too awkward. "He" Sam raised his eyebrows. Dean liked how Sams mimic was always so intense, the frowning, the eyebrow raising, he found it funny. "He?" Dean nodded and in Sam's eyes suddnely was a glim of understanding. "Dean, you just can't fall in love with an angel, are you crazy? His father will kill you" he laughed out loud. Dean blushed even more. "I can't control it, okay?" "It is totally okay with me , but why didn't you tell it any further? Or tell CAS?" Dean shrugged his shoulders. "I think I was kinda afraid... Bitch." "Jerk. But promise me to ask him out the next time we see him" Dean was about to agree when he heard a deep voice from the dark side of the room: "You don't have to. I say yes" Cas stepped out of the shadow, smiling at Dean brightly, a little flower in his hand.  
And finally, after all this time Dean really smiled again.


	3. Crowley (who doesn't really care anyway)

„I'll take that case“ Crowley said with a bright smile and appeared infront of a young man. „but, I just...“ he was obviously puzzled and Crowley rolled his eyes. „I know, you just talked to a young attractive lady before. What a pitty, that I am the boss here, so do you want to save your daughter now or WHAT?!“ The man fastly nodded and Crowley smiled. „After the deal your daughter will be absolutely fine again, you will have 10 happy years with her and after that we can have a good time“ The man didn't seem to be very pleased about that. „How do I sign the deal?“ He stuttered nervously, why must all these guys stutter when he came to the deal. „A deal is signed with a kiss,“ he said and came a step nearer, singing „Just a little kiss“  
A few seconds he was back in hell again, still singing. „You know that no one buys your I-am-just-joking-tour Crowley“ a demon said. „And you know people won't be pleased about it, so simply take the females.“ Crowley took a deep breath. „ You know that, I am still King of the crossroad, right? So let me fucking take the cases I want. And I tell you more, someday I will be the king of you all and then, I don't care and I will snog as many young guys begging for the life of their daughter I want.“ The demon shrugged. „So you are actually...“ Crowley sighed. „Who cares anyway? Just do your job and get us more souls“  
Crowley always smiles remembering this talk. Now he WAS king of hell and he could do what he want, not that he didn't do anyway.  
But it still felt good. Today infact it was 10 years later and The first Hellhound was ready to bring the soul to him.


	4. Castiel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.

Castiel had been a brave soldier, following commands without thinking about it, always trusting in his father.  
But somewhen he started to wonder, if these words were God's or the archangel's and if he wanted to know anyway.  
Would his father let this all happen? The killings? The wars? The intolerance?  
When he was a young angel Gabriel always told him God was loving everyone, accepting everyone, even the ones who didn't believe in him.   
„But when this is true,“ Cas thought sometimes, „then why are we supposed to kill non believers. Why are people not allowed to love who they want, why can't I?“  
And when it all got too much, he started to rebel. He knew how this could end, how the rebellion ended for Lucifer, but he didn't care.  
Cas wanted justice.  
He wanted to find his father and ask him „Why?“   
He knew he was out there, he got his command to save Dean from hell, and he was rescued by him several times.  
It was a long search, but he found him.  
God was sitting in his little dark room, drinking Whiskey from a bottle, starring at a wall.  
„Hello“ he greeted Castiel without even looking. „Hello father,“ Castiel said, his head sinking with due deference. „I searched for you a long time,“ he said, his blue eyes directly looking in God's.  
God sighed. „I know, Castiel. You have questions, I know that too.“ Castiel nodded and came nearer slowly. „Why are you here?“ God smiled. „Because it is time for you to grow up. To learn responsibility for the humans. I can't always care for you all, my time will be over aswell and you will be totally alone.“ Cas didn't understand. „But, we need your help, we need a leader. Don't you see how many things are going wrong? How my older brothers are doing wrong in the name of you? I always thought you were accepting...“ Cas looked at the floor, breathing slowly, deeply, trying not to go crazy. „I am.“ „And why are people and angels getting killed in your name? If you are loving and accepting everone , why aren't your children allowed?“ He was angry, angry at God and he couldn't hold it back. How could he?  
„You are my dear son, now you just have to teach that to your brothers and sisters. Teach them the misunderstanding, teach them the love and acceptance you learned from me.“ He nodded, looking at God again. So Gabriel was right? „Thank you father,“ Cas said, smiling relieved. „I now have to see someone, because there is a person I always loved but never aknowledged and I finally have the right to love...him. He is a good person, father“ Cas has never been happier to be an angel of the Lord, a soldier, a rebellion.  
God rolled his eyes. „I know that, son, I may be in exile, but I still know what is going on. And now hurry up and teach my children.“  
Cas again thanked for the time and slowly walked out. While leaving he heared a mumbled „As if I were against homosexuality, pah. I hate all this incompetent prophets, writing what they want to“.“  
Cas has always been a good soldier, following the commands of God, but only him. He had much to do now, but at first he had to meet Dean.


	5. Chapter 5

„I have to talk to you little brother.“ Cas shrugged, that clearly was Gabriels voice. Was somethign wrong with him? As fast as he could, and that was pretty fast, he turned up next to his angel brother.  
Gabriel was never the shy type, he always was the loud and funny angel and that was what Cas liked so much about him. Seeing him so quiet and sad was worrying.  
The archangel sighed: „Brother, I have to ask you something...“ Cas nodded confused, what question could be so important he had to personally call him to his earth exile?  
„How do you ask someone out? And I don't mean just for sex,I surely know how THAT works,“ his laugh sounded nervous. „I mean for a real, romantic date. Without tricks or anything.“  
Cas rose his eyebrows. His big borther, the mighty archangel Gabriel himself, asked him for an advice in love things? Something had to be seriously wrong. „Depends on who you ask, I think. Are you..Are you in love?“ Gabriel nodded shyly, still confused how this one person could make him so different. „And I have to tell you one more thing, little brother and I simply make it straight, because I am totally not. I never was and after my idiots of brothers are whether dead or gone, I am glad I can freely admit I am gay. „ Cas smiled. „I am glad you told me this, brother. But you shouldn't have feared these people, Gabe. You know they could never have done anyhting about it.“ Gabriel nodded. „Yeah. I am kinda stupid“ Castiel could almost literally see the happiness in his brother's brown eyes. „And who is this guy you want to date now?“ Gabe looked at his shoes, cursing himself for being so ashamed about it. „He is a human and you know him, quite good.“ His little brother starred at him in shock. He wasn't talking about... „I think I might love Sam Winchester...“ Castiel sighed relieved. „Why, why did you do that sighing?“ „I am just happy we don't have to fight for one guy now.“ Gabriel rose is head. „You mean? Awesome little brother.“ he tried to give Cas a high-five but stopped when he looked really confused at his palm. He often forgot how the other angels weren't really „up to date“ with human gestures and sayings. „Nevermind. But still, what shall I do now?“ After a moment of silence Cas had an idea: „ Just say the direct truth as you just did, that might work. They only know you as the lying Trickster, maybe it works. I don't know, I am just as stupid in this topic as you are.“  
Both kept talking a few hours and it felt right to finally admit the feeling they had for the two Winchester brothers.  
„Do you think that all could work out?“ Cas said after some time. „Remember the words of father? Love is patient, love is kind. Bla bla bla bla bla, it always trusts, always hopes, etcetera, etcetera. Maybe he is right after all.“ Both nodd. „Do you know what he told me on he day he made the humans? He said he made different genders, so the choice is bigger. I think that was quite nice of him.“  
Gabriel was really happy he could share this with his brother and he was glad he didn't had to hide his feelings anymore. But Castiel was right, he should have told that a long time ago, his brothers couldn't have changed who he loves and when even father was okay with it, why fear?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." Corinthian 13:4-8  
> (if you didn't know)


End file.
